Step-by-step instructions

I was out for a walk yesterday when I came upon a dogeared & badly worn, handwritten note that appeared to have been hastily written and stuck to a post by the entrance to the park.

The note clearly listed step-by-step instructions and was entitled, "How to pick up dog poo". Clearly the author was trying to make a point as the park was laid out like a minefield of dog faeces!

It read :

1. Take several plastic bags with you when you take your dog for a walk,

2. When your dog stops & starts to smell the ground - get out a bag cause you are going to need it soon.

3. Put your hand in the bag, grab the dog poo from the ground and lift it up.

4. Turn the bag inside out (still holding the poo), tie and put in the bin.

5. Continue enjoying the walk with your dog.

6. Repeat as necessary and stop messing the park for the rest of us !

Sounds easy, but why do so few people clean up after their dog ?

To give you an idea what it is like to walk in a park covered with doggy doo have a play of this game and very quickly you will see what damage a few dogs can do to a green open space in only a few short minutes if left to their own devices.

Will you take a stand and clean up the park or will you just turn the other cheek and let it all wash over you?

Best I can do is a £70 fine - how about you :-)

Doggy Poo

I can't wait for my kids to go back to school - they are driving me mad.

Today I took them down to the local Blockbuster to get them a DVD to keep them amused for an hour or so and saw this DVD for rent in the kids section.

Doggy Poo : "Sometimes dreams really do come true"

The title character is deposited at the side of the road by a little dog. Poo then wonders about the meaning of life & why he exists and decides to travel the world.

He meets some friends along the way, including a leaf and a clump of soil(!), before eventually meeting a dandelion who uses him as fertilizer.

The moral of the story - even the humblest were created by God for a reason.
It was created by the Korean's - a race that have interesting views on dog fouling and how to deal with the resulting mess. Remember Dog Shit Girl ?

All I can see is that the Korean's are undoing all the good work that has been done in the UK to eradicate incidents of dog fouling. After watching this DVD my kids went out to collect some "cute" dog faeces and then reinacted the DVD in their bedrooms.

I have a good mind to sue the producer of this filth when my kids go blind with toxocariasis!

Saying that though - the tunes aren't half catchy and I find myself humming "I'm a little doggy poo" all day at work.

At Last, The Two Topics Combine!

Dick Felton of Keep Britiain Tidy has, at last, realised that dog fouling and red rubber bands are inextricably linked in the minds of the British public.

As Dick put it: "Elastic bands may not be as visually offensive as dog dirt or half-eaten pizza, but they are most definitely litter."

Postal workers appear to be claiming that they are discarding their rubber bands because they are being forced to work too fast. To date, I have yet to see a postal worker running down my road.

I thank the Guardian for highlighting the problem here.

Poo Trap

I love gizmo's and gadgets. I'm fascinated in new and innovative technology, particularly if it can be used in the war against dog fouling.

Since this blog started I have shown you several of the weapons of war that are available to all in this never ending campaign.

From the cute designer poo bags and bizarre poo catcher to the chilling force behind poop freeze, not forgetting my favourite, the swooper scooper. I particularly like the way that the designer has incorporated an offensive weapon within this product.

Next up is this new product from America. I wont go into detail describing exactly what it does just yet, watch the video and see for yourself. As you do, marvel at the way that the inventor has created a product so discrete that you wouldn't even notice that your dog was wearing it - pure genius in design.

The company website includes a FAQ section which promises to answer all your nagging concerns.

I particularly like the way they emphasis the dogs excitement at using the product, the respect you will have for them, their indepth research and how it works particularly well with diarrhea!!!

Will my dog get used to "PooTrap" easily? : "Of course, they might feel a bit uncomfortable at first, however after 5 to 10 minutes when they are used to it, they will start to run happily again."

I'm sure my dog will not like it? : "Actually, according to our research 98% of dogs that use PooTrap for 3 days will be excited to see the product and their owner."

Should I always use the "PooTrap" when walking my dog? : "Yes, even when your dog is having diarrhea."

My dog doesn't feel respected when wearing the "PooTrap"? : "Babies wear diapers and they are truly loved by their parents, hence same applied to dog owners."

Can "PooTrap" be used when dogs are having diarrhea or at home? : "You will be glad to have PooTrap when your dog is having diarrhea. They can wear it in your home."

The product is priced from $29.95 for Poop Size 1 to $38.95 for Poop Size 8.

They don't explain how you work out your dogs Poop Size measurements, but I recon size 8 is an elephant judging by the size of the bags included!!

Talk About On Your Own Doorstep!!!

I had occasion today to attend my local sorting office to collect a parcel.

While there, I decided to conduct some undercover work regarding red rubber bands. Such covert activity is not easy, therefore the quality of the following video is not perfect but it indicates the attitude of those, who would pollute our society with this foul menace, which glows red with the anger of Satan!

The marks on the ground are a little unclear but they are red rubber bands. Click the thumbnail to share my experience!

Now it would be easy to dismiss this as simply people not caring about their workplace but it is worse. This has clearly been done to provoke members of the public. It obviously works. While the assistant was getting my parcel, I took the following picture of a sign by the counter:

Quite clearly, they are aware of the effects and have faced abuse as a result. This does not require a sign, it requires action by the governement!

How long will this attack on our civilisation last?